between god and hitler.

"outside of God and Hitler--nobody is any better or worse than anyone else--just different"

see. my friends can be profound.

a good friend of mine said this to me last year, and the words still stand. he may not have realized the weight of the words--in fact he probably doesn't even remember saying it--but it does hold a lot of truth. i don't consider myself a judgmental person, but I, like many, am guilty of snap judgments. this is common; that's why so much emphasis is placed on first impressions. whether it is someone you are actually meeting for the first time or glances at strangers on the train, we carry around our own filters of what qualifies as "acceptable" or "normal." often times, we connect what is outside our comfort zone or what is different as synonymous with wrong. we can even become scared because it is foreign to us--but does this really serve as justification to judge people?.

with recognition of this concept in mind, sometimes your first impressions are right. i think that is what makes us so quick to judge. you use snap judgments as a defense mechanism. when we get a bad first impression but still make the effort and let our guard down, there is a high risk of getting hurt. so we don't let people in at all--if they aren't like you, if they aren't the ones to take the initiative--why bother? it is hard to put yourself on the line. but if we can immediately label someone in an unfavorable light, then we can avoid getting hurt all together. We write them off into a category of "not worth it." we can also end up missing out on someone really awesome. as for me, i'm still trying to find a balance between being guarded and not overextending myself. sometimes, no matter how people hurt us, we become a bottomless pit of initiative. i would rather regret giving too much of myself then wondering if i missed out on the opportunity to know someone, well, worth knowing. even if it is more painful and an overextention of myself, I won't be left wondering.

its even harder to determine what is worse: thinking you know someone and then being betrayed or someone not caring at all. both scenarios force you to construct walls--or in some cases, write songs that someone may or may not ever see.. songs, poetry, journals, even these blogs can serve as little windows of insight to people. but how far can will it open?

-k.